It’s Good to Be Back

I have neglected this blog. I decided to pursue other writing under an assumed name, because I felt I would not be completely myself if I was worried about what people may think of my deeper, more personal thoughts and feelings. However, I haven’t written much there, either. Writing for me comes and goes in terms of desire and inspiration, and it’s been a very eventful year. 2015 featured in its table of contents the death of my mother, the serious violation of my loved-one by a predator, a very difficult and stressful job that I left, and has culminated with my trip to the doctor. I left with a prescription for antidepressants, and also- a higher dose of Levothyroxine for my under-active thyroid. I feel better. I am grateful for the help, and I am slowing coming back into the light. 

So, if you struggle with your weight despite watching everything you eat, portion control, and regular exercise, it’s time to see your doctor, especially if you are a woman, to see if an underactive thyroid could be the culprit. Let me tell you that my weight has already dropped by 8 pounds since getting the right dose of thyroid medication. My appetite is greatly reduced, and sometimes I have to remind myself to eat more. 1,000 calories seems like a lot now! And really, I need a bit more than that. As to low-carb, I have been doing that for so long, that eating that way for the most part is just my normal routine. The problem comes in when I start engaging in a few deleterious behaviors. If you are struggling to stay on low-carb, or have stopped seeing success, watch out for the following  bad habits which may have crept in.

  1. Alcohol consumption. I had been creeping up on drinking. Usually I indulged in light beer, or that new water-based beverage with basically no carbs but still with alcohol. So your liver focuses on detoxing the alcohol, blood sugar actually drops, and you end up more hungry. If you are consuming very sweet drinks, however, that changes the dynamic a bit, and you are still taking in those extra calories in place of actually giving your body nutrition. Also, if you are addictive, as I am, it’s a very bad sugar substitute, alcohol. It leads to all sorts of evils. Keeping things in moderation is not what an addictive is good at. An addict is good at more and more all the time. I prefer the term ‘addictive’, because it means to me that I am prone to it, but am not necessarily committed to it. I believe the stress of the year contributed to my choice to drink more, but it’s certainly not a good self-medication therapy. Things were spinning out of control.
  2. Too many cheat days. A cheat meal is not the same thing as a cheat DAY. That one day of eating whatever I wanted was really hard to come back from. One meal is much easier to recover from, in terms of blood sugar levels. Besides, I always feel like crap after a big, nasty carb day. I don’t mean oatmeal and quinoa. I was loading up on cookies, donuts, and ice cream- like- all day long. Immediately I would retain fluids and be up about 1-4 pounds virtually overnight. No joke. Now, last night I made a tuna casserole, and I ate some for dinner. I won’t be surprised to find I am up a pound over yesterday, but I also recognize that will correct itself if I get back on track today. And I have no problem doing that, because I didn’t completely put my body out of whack by indulging all day long yesterday.
  3. No activity. I had a sit down job, and was mentally drained at the end of the day. I skipped too many workouts. It showed. At the age of 46-47, muscle loss happens more quickly almost yearly. It takes weight bearing exercise to keep muscle. Don’t neglect it, and don’t do overdo the cardio at the expense of weight bearing. it helps to  actually schedule my workouts on the calendar. I even set reminders on my phone with encouraging , tough love messages, like, “Work out today, you know you want to!” Or, “Get moving, you lazy slug!” Whatever works. There are many great sources for finding a good routine. Gyms have trainers, often for free, who will help you put a plan together and hold you accountable for progress.
  4. Not weighing in once a week. It was easier to ignore the scale altogether than to face the truth. Weighing first thing in the morning once or twice a week helps me see the immediate effects of my nutrition and exercise habits and to make adjustments. Just don’t get obsessive about it. For example, don’t be disappointed when you’re five pounds up during PMS week.
  5. Stress. It’s easy to get worked up about the election, the cat that just peed on the bed when you just washed the comforter the night before, or that your parent is in the hospital. Stress is deadly. It’s deadly to your diet, your mental health, and many other areas of your physical health. Try prayer, mediation, yoga, talking to a friend. Do what you need to do to get healthy. Sometimes a therapist may be helpful. Sometimes a trip to the doctor is in order. Some people are just very good at staying low-stress, because they have great coping mechanisms and understand that life is a beautiful thing that is just naturally ‘flawed’. That’s part of the beauty. We learn, we grow in faith, or we suffer. We do all the right things, and we still suffer. But in the midst of that, be sure to keep reaching out. Talk to someone. Work through the issues. Worry won’t solve it.
  6. Food is fuel. It should be tasty and enjoyed, but don’t make it the love of your life. Focus on family, friends, staying healthy. Develop hobbies that don’t involve running to the kitchen for a mindless snack simply out of boredom.
  7. Getting SO bored of oily meat and salads! Believe me, I know! Go to http://www.ibreatheimhungry.com , as one shining example, of GREAT LC/GF and other diet specialty recipes and ideas. Start a low-carb board on Pinterest and look for and try the huge variety of recipes and refresh your idea of what low-carb is. Everybody is busy, but not every meal needs to be roast beef wrapped around 1/2 stick of butter. Get your creative juices flowing. Set aside a time and a budget for some of the pricier ingredients that low-carb can include. For example- almond flour, xanthan gum, Swerve, etc. You need to find a good source for some of these ingredients, because not all are available, or available at a good price, at the local grocers. Meanwhile, investigate new recipes for old standbys. There’s more to do with broccoli than just steam it.
  8. Peer pressure. Your family wants mashed potatoes, corn bread, corn, and fried chicken. Fine. Let them have it. You don’t have to eat it. Have a grilled chicken salad with avocado, and colorful red bell pepper, and make them jealous!
  9. Trigger foods. Pizza? Hot rolls? Fresh cookies? Decide if it’s really worth it. Decide if you can act in moderation. Do your best to just ignore it. It’s not a temptation unless you BELIEVE it to be. Maybe this is the time for the cheat meal. But maybe you can wait for the birthday cake on Friday. You get the idea. Have some suitable, satisfying alternatives in your pantry or fridge to satisfy the immediate urges, and carry on.

Favorite low-carb emergency foods: (assuming you are ok with artificial sweeteners . I have alternatives for those, too. )

Light and Fit Greek yogurt at 80 calories and about 9 net carbs. YUM. Very satisfying. Atkin’s meal and treat bars. String cheese. Flavored almonds, Low carb tortillas are in my home at all times. I use them for everything. Even my own pizza. I use liquid stevia in my coffee. Cottage cheese with berries on top. I make mock cheesecakes in single serve sizes using ramekins. I sweeten with Splenda or Swerve or stevia. Berry-protein smoothies. I use vanilla whey or vanilla vegan protein powder and mix with almond milk and frozen blueberries or strawberries.  I mix in spinach as well, and can’t even taste it once blended. I have this regularly for breakfast.

Mashed cauliflower instead of potatoes. Light and Crisp crackers by Wasa. Peanut butter is a huge staple, as well as almond flour. I enjoy eggs, and use them in a variety of ways. The point here is, with a little investigation and strategy, you can build your own low-carb go-to stash that works for YOU. Notice that most of these have a protein component. Proteins and fats are your FRIENDS. Stop trying to avoid fat. The only time you want to avoid fat is when it’s the fake, hydrogenated kind found in things like Lil’ Debbie’s snack cakes, pre-packaged junk like Cheetos, bologna, etc. The more prepared it is, the worse it generally is for you.

So, I am back. The medication is certainly helping me get back to where I feel like me again, but God has been at work in my life big time. I am very grateful for all the support and love I have had from friends and family , and for all the prayers. If you see yourself in a similar struggle, don’t go it all alone. Talk to someone. Take your life back.

 

 

 

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My Clean Eating Is a Little Dirty…

Yeah, well. I wasn’t worried about the clean eating challenge the week before my T-25 Challenge. After all, I eat right. Lots of veggies, whole foods, very little packaged…at least, I tell myself that all the time.

However, it turns out that a few of my favorite things are not clean. In fact, they are downright smutty.  Let’s look at the Jimmy Dean breakfast sausage links yesterday. I stopped midway through the second link and stopped and said out loud, “Oh, no. What am I DOING?”.  I ate it anyway. I disappointed myself. At work, I drank my usual two Splenda sweetened energy drinks. Not horrible, I guess. I suppose I am not entirely convinced that Splenda is bad for me. I guess I made my own rules, there.

What about the two small spoons of marshmallow cream tonight I had after dinner? Tiny, but that was about 10 grams of carbs, and nothing but delightful, horrible sugar. It seemed to kill my cravings. I worked out tonight, and feel like I might have undone a bit of my progress. I should have held fast. I didn’t. I caved. It might be that I should up my carb count now, with the increasing work outs. Trying to keep it to 25 grams has been harder than ever lately. Today it was probably more like 45. Not a sin for the average eater. In fact, that would be low. But I feel like I won’t lose fat at that rate. I am not sure. So far, I tend to just stay steady at 134-136. Can’t seem to reach that 130 holy grail. Something has to give. I am seeing new definition in my upper abs, but the lower portion still looks like someone who is either 45, (me) had two kids, (again, me, but 19 years ago!) or is using that as an excuse. Flabby chicken skin is not attractive. But guess what? I am still getting stronger. As we age, the skin just doesn’t quite spring back into taut condition, even with fat loss and muscle toning. I won’t let that stop me from trying, though. After all, I really just got started on the ab routine not long ago. I found some great exercises to tone the lower abs on my Yoga Booty Ballet DVD. You use a small ball, and squeeze that tight between your knees as you do a half sit up. The kind that actually work the abs, not kill the back of the neck.  And as you’re squeezing, if you touch your lower abs, you can feel they are actually getting worked.

More to the point, I have found a great way to meet people, a community of low-carb and fitness experts and fans, and it’s all quite exciting. I love the feeling of making new acquaintances and friends along this journey to health.

I have a few more kryptonite food items/substances like nicotine gum to kick out of my life. I need to not need a Monster Lo-carb to feel energetic. There’s still a lot of hard work I need to learn to do. I have whole new levels I need to push myself to. I can do a run one day and feel strong, and push past my old limit, and the very next time I am struggling to get through 2/3 of it. I think the important thing is to never stop!

People like to philosophize that it doesn’t matter- we should just do whatever we want because we all die anyway. But that’s not the point. I know I am going to die anyway. It’s working toward a goal that matters! No matter what that goal may be. Not a goal to see how quickly I can ruin my health and treat my body and mind like they’re worthless. But rather, a goal to strive toward more excellence. In that endeavor, the reward IS the journey, and the life is made worth living. I spend the prime years of my youth wasting the potential I had, partying and not believing in anything, much less myself. Now I find a new strength and sense of purpose in testing my limits. The other argument is that I should not beat myself up for making a slip or mistake. I get that. I’m OK that I messed up, or I wouldn’t have messed up. I chose it. I just don’t want to PAY for it, you see…

Anything you want to add?

 

Would you like to join my challenge? You can use whatever of our DVD workouts you like, and you should get the challenge pack, because the Shakeology is fairly low carb and filling, and has so many vitamins and superfoods in it, it’s unheard of. Besides, it’s a lot cheaper to just get the challenge pack.

and if you’re looking to add income to your life while working in fitness, this is IT. Hit me up for info if you’re ready.

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327883, that’s the number if you want to order from me! 

Let’s Get Real

I started this low-carb blog with several purposes in mind. First, I wanted to flex my typing fingers and actually write. I never intended to post strictly about low-carb eating, despite my blog’s title. Next, it’s good to be in a like-minded group of other low-carbers, to offer up strategies, recipes, and most importantly, support.  Finally, it feels good to write again. I would love to tell you how I am such a great writer, that I’ve been discovered and asked to write for magazines. That hasn’t happened. It’s a sobering ego-check to realize that you’re probably not that great. Then again, I usually just sit down and bang these blog posts out with very little planning or editing. You get back what you put out, to a large degree. I have not wanted to post anything here that might be good enough to plagiarize. That’s my excuse, and I like it.

As to low-carb weight loss! I am now maintaining my weight at about 132. That’s up from my all time low, as you may recall, of 122. I am certainly not depressed over being 132. I was at 147, even an all time high of 155 at one point, and I have no plans to return there. However, I would like to examine why it is that my weight has crept up.

1) I’m not holding myself to a strict 20-25 grams per day. I could not realistically continue to maintain that low carb count for two straight years. Maybe I could have, I take that back, but I didn’t.

2) In addition to playing fast and loose with the numbers, I have allowed more cheat days to creep in. There’s a bad habit our bakery department has at work of leaving mistakenly made or not-picked-up items in the break room for the employees to devour. After about the third or fourth time of walking by it, sitting next to it, and smelling it- after seeing so many other employees of all weights and sizes partake, I am only human. I cave. Incidents like these have happened more frequently as summer has come to a close. Is it just me, or does it get harder to eat right at this time of year? Every brother and their mother is bringing baked goods to work, and I even bought some canned pumpkin, which I have not opened yet. Then, my birthday is coming up, and I am already planning my splurge day.

3) Running.” You’ll get smaller,” they said. “It’s all muscle weight”, they said. I don’t know about all of that, but it seems the more I run, the more I gain. “Run more”, they said. “I’ve had enough this week!”, I said. Truth be told, I feel quite accomplished to run at ALL. I don’t know that I want to up the ante and get to 15-20 miles a week. I’ve been good at my 2-3k, 2-3 times per week. Sorry if that’s not good enough, all you hard-core runners. In fact, sometimes it’s even less. My neck and shoulders have been aching due to some sort of bone/muscle issue I’ve had off and on for years, and I haven’t run since 10-14. I did four miles that day.

4) I make the mistake of eating sugar free treats because I miss sweetness. I  have always had a huge sweet tooth, and sometimes it’s actually a fang. I eat the stuff, and I have lots of gas and frequent trips to the bathroom for hours or a day when I do. Sorry to be so graphic, but that’s why I called this post, “Let’s Get Real”. It’s not like it’s all sunshine and roses over here. I struggle to stay on low-carb, and sometimes I really run off the path and get lost in the Black Forest (cake).

So, what am I doing right? Why haven’t I gained all the weight back? Why haven’t I just given up completely?

What I am doing right: I exercise for health and heart strength, strong bones and muscles above weight loss concerns. Though I need to be more consistent, I have not given up. I keep getting back on that treadmill and doing those crunches and planks.

I still eat the majority of time in low-carb mode, including snacks. String cheese, nuts, raw veggies and ranch were yesterday’s snacks. Dinner was kielbasa and green beans with a light alfredo sauce. I was satisfied. I buy no-carb bagels online that are mostly soy protein. I drink almond milk. I enjoy eggs, bacon, and plenty of salad regularly.

I don’t throw in the towel and give up just because I splurged one day, or even on two occasions in a week, for example. I start all over the next day, attempting to balance things out.

I resign myself to the knowledge that if I really want to lose about eight pounds fairly rapidly, I will go back to eating only 20 grams of carbs per day, until I reach that goal. Turns out I am not feeling like I have to right now.

Finally, I remember that cravings for certain foods are not just physical. They are psychological and even spiritual for me. My natural desires can either be directed toward healthy habits and hobbies, or destructive ones. For example, if I am off of work, sitting here on the couch, contemplating what to do with my day, I have choices. I can involve myself in housework, work on my blog, chat with friends on Facebook, or go outside and play with my play-deprived dog. That would be constructive behavior.  OR, I can dump some food in her bowl, get in the car and do some mindless shopping for things I don’t need and can’t afford. I might throw beer or wine into my cart, with plans to enjoy it later. I might buy more sugar free foods, or another makeup item i don’t need. This is destructive behavior. Even worse, I might just never get off the sofa, watching TV all day- a huge creativity and productivity killer, with plans to work out on this gorgeous, sunny fall day, that never actually materialize.

I don’t always make the right choices. Do you? Are you the super-motivator? Are you so regularly spectacular that you are a motivational speaker now and have a couple of books published? Does Tony Robbins consult YOU? If so, congratulations. Enjoy every  moment of the fame, success, and all that life has to offer.  Wow, am I bitter?

🙂 Anyway, there’s more to life that feeding our faces or our desires. My mom is probably sitting on her sofa, wishing she could even leave her home and do anything other than suck on that oxygen tube. There are a lot of people not too far from us who could use something we have to give. I have to give. TIme, love, friendship.

Take care!

Flying Walenda Diet

Ya’ know, falling is not an option if you’re suspended a thousand miles or feet above the ground, walking across a metal cable.

But I call Low-carb the Flying Walenda Diet because it IS all about balance. Today found me way out of balance. The day was perfect in terms of dietary choices until I got home. My nemesis was waiting for me. CAKE.

As long as I believe cake has power over me, it does. Today I was a true believer. I went back several times for slices that got increasingly thick. I also decided to do better than that, and had a good cup sized ‘sample’ of my own tater tot/chicken/cheese casserole.

Earlier this afternoon I decided to scarf up quite a few tortilla chips, and I just had a glass of Barefoot Pinot Cheapio. It’s been a completely unbalanced, stellar day.

Why? I can tell you that as soon as I walked into the kitchen at 3:00 a.m., and saw that shiny, plastic cake under glass, I was done for. Without even thinking I took the heavy lid off, stopped myself suddenly, and said aloud, “What in the world are you doing ? Geez!!” I packed my obedient low-carb lunch and headed off to a world of signs, stickers, and depression.

But I had already set myself up to desire that cake. I didn’t think of it all day, but as soon as I walked into the kitchen again this afternoon, there it was. I stared at it while eating my tortilla chips and hummus. It was too late. I had let it into my mind. So, I decided, OK, today is carb day. I will possibly gain another four pounds overnight. I’ve seen it happen before. I will consume a lot of low carb fare tomorrow, and knowing me, a lot of fiber.

We lose our balance sometimes. We are not expected to live a life where there is never a mindless snack, never a slip in our steely reserve. I have gained five pounds from my low of 123. Ok, Sometimes it’s closer to 8.

I am slowly coming around to a more relaxed attitude. Complete vigilance was of utmost importance when settling into my new life in low-carb. Now, I’ve slipped up, crept up, and let my hard-ass attitude relax. Yay, right?

Problem there is that I am gaining weight. So, time to re-balance.

Was the cake that great? No, it was a box kit at home. I don’t care! It’s moist, sweet, and it has icing. Those are all the requirements it needs.

The casserole? Everyone raved about it. I had to find out if I deserved my own press. Was it amazing? No, it was good. My salad with grilled chicken on top was better.

The wine? I usually don’t indulge, and for reasons that have very little to do with diet, I am limited to one serving per day. It keeps the dark side from emerging. My dark side isn’t too dark, it’s just SO damned candid and overly honest…

I like to make jokes that I am just storing my extra five for the upcoming winter, but that’s a whole lot of bull. That’s what November is for. 🙂

Whatever and wherever your walk in weight loss and eating right is, remember to cut yourself some slack, allow for the wobbles and re-balancing, and so what if you have a feast one night at the fiesta, as long as you get back on the horse. If you wish. Is that what honors your body, mind, and spirit?

Honor those things.

Honor the occasional craving, honor the discipline it takes to continue meeting your own goals. Stay active. Breathe.

“Greatness is excellence filtered through humility”. -Me

So, Summer Begins…

Many things from our childhood stay with us. As a kid, I was never into sports. In addition to being an only child, with no dad, I had very poor vision, that was undiscovered until I was ten, and not corrected until I was thirteen. As you might guess, I was the last chosen for any team.   I never ran, and  hated all forms of ball games. I pouted, frowned, shuffled, cried, and was generally a complete pill on any ‘team’ my p.e. teachers put together. I thought that Dodge Ball was a cruel hoax invented by evil teachers, and I found many animals in the clouds while I was  standing in hot outfields, tuning out people yelling, “GET THE BALL!!!”  On my own time, though, I learned to be a kid daredevil, climbing up scaffolding and defying death in many stupid ways.

Today the kids and I decided to play a bit of freeze tag, and then baseball. Our baseball is a tennis ball, and our bat is this broken orange thing that bends too much and is an over-sized plastic relic, really. Nonetheless, I enjoy these outings, and have a lot of fun. I get to feel like a good step-parent, and maybe it helps me feel a teeny, tiny bit better about not playing with my own kids more when they were little, being too concerned with housework or   laundry.

Everything was great until my ten year old stepson yelled out, “LEE! YOU CAN’T EVEN CATCH!” Suddenly, I was nine again, being taunted by the kids on the kickball or baseball team, and I felt a lot of the same old rejected- loser feelings, and anger. I wanted to stop playing, to just go inside and say “screw it”. It was an immature impulse, and my adult sensibilities eventually won out, but it’s funny how some things stick with you, inside you. Dormant sparks of pain can be easily rekindled. I was surprised. It’s true. My catching and hitting are still pretty poor, and on some days these ‘skills’ are completely missing. I remember, though, that everyone seemed to be a critic and offer their opinions on my lack of ball-handling skills when I was a kid. I hated it, them, and mostly myself. I was always tough on myself anyway. I expected to be able to do things the older kids and adults could do, and nobody could convince me that I had to learn it over time. I was obviously a defect.  At home, one step-dad or another was harshly correcting me on how to properly sit on the toilet or yelling at me for something, but from those male ‘father figures’, there was no love, and I never shed a tear when they and my mom would inevitably break up.

It took a lot of time before I got even remotely interested in any kind of sport. I was nineteen. It started with biking, hiking, and then tennis. I didn’t ever get good at tennis, but I really enjoyed it, and still do.

I have learned over time to be happy with playing, even without playing well- for the most part. But somehow, hearing a kid criticize me brought up all these old feelings of worthlessness, all because of not catching a tennis ball lobbed at me. Why?

Why should it matter or even bother me?

When we are kids, we are like wet cement, or little flowers. We are fragile, easily molded, or trampled. The things we experience shape our entire lives. If the majority of our experiences are positive, encouraging, and loving, we tend to feel a lot better about ourselves. When we feel good about ourselves, we are more confident, more likely to experience success, and that success fuels more likelihood of even more future success.

Some people have more natural pluck and resilience than others. Some might set out to resolutely prove their detractors wrong. Others believe the negative barrage, and live it out.

Interestingly, the things I was encouraged in were the very things I became the best at, but deep inside, I have always felt as though most people were more grown up and more competent than I. I have learned a bit about not comparing myself to others, but it’s still a challenge.

So, parents, coaches, friends, step-parents, grandparents, teachers; all of us: please, don’t criticize, tease and bully others. Don’t make people feel bad because they lack a certain skill. Don’t make such a big deal about it if someone you know and ‘love’ doesn’t perform a task at your level. Teach them, or let them be themselves. Not everyone is a natural athlete. Not everyone likes sports. Some of us like to read, write, and cook. Maybe, with love and acceptance, and a bit of encouragement, these people will excel in what THEY love. Help them discover what that is, and remember that the seeds you are planting today will keep sprouting, with deepening roots, forever. Kids are, well- kids. Stop trying to control their every move. Remember how powerful a gruff voice can be. Parents, correct and discipline with love as the motivation, not some twisted concept of creating someone in your own image, or worse, trying to create someone you wish you could have been.

Kids need time to grow, to learn, and to just be kids. Let them. Be patient. Accept them as they are.

Go enjoy every moment of the summer. Kick off your polished shoes and just relax with your family. Laugh, and remember what it’s like to be a kid.

Fallen from Low-Carb Grace?!

I’d like to believe that I ‘got this’ when it comes to low-carb eating and living. It’s all been done, I know all the ways to stay at my weight, yada yada.

This last two weeks have been a dismal failure. Not because I didn’t stay low-carb, but not AS low as I had been. I thought for sure that at this point, I could increase my carb count. I’ve been at 30-35 for so long, what would fifty hurt? I am sure I have not exceeded 50, but that’s all it took, I guess. This week, especially, I have watched my weight climb by almost a pound a DAY.  I can’t even explain to you how this has pissed me off and mystified me simultaneously. I will spend hours of thought on trying to figure out just what series of mistakes I have been making in order to cut it out. The extra meat portions? The no-holds-barred approach to salad dressing and extra large portions of salad? The extra carbs in addition to that? The old urges returning?

The thought of going back to a strict 20-gram induction has  not escaped me. The idea of the eggs/cheese/fat/meat/greens that I stayed so faithful to for so long without a break is not exactly thrilling me, though.

My low weight was 123. I decided 126-128 was fine. Two days ago I was at 129.4, yesterday it was 130, today it is 131.4 . I don’t know what gives, but I am  up almost ten pounds. Still, I do feel fit and not fat, but where does this end? What am I willing to do to make it stop? What do I have to do? Do I have to go back to stage 1, induction, or stage 2, with some extra portion control? Does portion control still merit a look-see even on Atkin’s? Funny thing is, I never needed to worry about that before. Two eggs or three, more or less bacon; it didn’t seem to matter.

I do believe our bodies are pre-set to a range of ‘normal’ weight, that if we undercut through  extreme measures, our bodies will slow down to conserve energy, thus making it so easy to gain, and so much harder to lose. I do believe age is also a factor. But no matter what I believe, the only person who can change this is me.

So, off the horse of “easy-peasy” I have fallen. I’m quite annoyed about it.

I wonder if my new schedule of working super early in the morning could be part of the culprit? While I try not to eat before a ‘normal’ breakfast time, many days find me eating at 5 a.m., nine a.m, after work at one o’clock, and having a normal dinner, and possibly a snack after that. Maybe it’s all too much.

Here come the maybe’s. I told you I’d be stewing.

And here’s the thing about all this physical activity ‘causing’ weight loss. It’s not enough to exercise and to burn off less than you are taking in. If this is true, calories DO still count. I guess it’s just easier to eat less when you feel satisfied, and maybe the bit of extra carbs has stoked up my appetite for more food. I think I may be on to something here.

Height: 5’4. Small frame/petite bone structure

High weight: 155: 2010

Mid-weight, end of 2010: Dieting for my wedding- watching carbs and portions but not too strictly- 135.

Three months after wedding- 142. Up to size 13 pants.

Began serious Atkin’s: January 2012

First three months: Pants looser, struggled on- no pounds lost. Fifth month- 7 pounds. Encouraged, continued to lose another 10 pounds in the next several months.

Feb-March- Maintained 123-125. Content with that.

April- The climb began at the end of this month, commensurate with increased exercise, coincidentally enough. I’ve seen this pattern before…

May: The climb plateaued, and I decided 127 was ok.

June: Maintaining until about the tenth. Then it all started to climb again, like mad. Several things changed though. I started getting lax in my counting, eating 2-3 Atkins bars at a time,   whereas one was fine before, eating larger portions, trying new recipes that were lowERED carb, not necessarily low enough…

Low-Weight: 122. February, 2013.

Well, any encouragement would be nice, and thank you for reading!