Finding Bigfoot, Fried Cheese, and Hillbilly Handfishing


Well, there's the proof. What's all the fuss about?

Ok, you guys with the Bigfoot research. In any other world, there are several ways to track anyone or any living thing. First of all, after honing in on the general area of the potential location of your bigfoot, raccoon, deer, or person, it is customary to bring in the tracking dogs. No? You say, that won’t work? Why the heck not? Can a Basset Hound not track any living thing? You might argue that the dog doesn’t know what it’s looking for. So, ok. Let’s think of another method. Set up remote, motion activated cameras in areas of probable sightings. (infrared night vision, naturally) The animal would not be afraid to tread in your area if you’re not there. No, you might argue. The animal would ‘sense’ something was hinky. Fine. Let’s look at forensic science. You searchers have been molding footprints of “Sasquatch” for years, but did you ever think to look for feces, HAIR samples, and ground disturbances that would show activity? Speaking of footprints, they show up very nicely by any drinking hole or the bank of a river.

Here’s another clue- there are professional trackers that do a pretty good job of finding people and animals. Oh, and guess what else? Where, where, where are the bones? Oh, wait- this is good news. They brought in real Native American trackers. That’s what I am talking about!

So, between a great night alone with Bigfoot, and Hillbilly Handfishing, I decided to whip up some fried cheese. It makes a yummy ‘chip’ for salsa and sour cream, all low-carb. The problem with it was that it is almost too intense, too salty, and too filling when fried. It also stinks up the house like burnt rennet. I didn’t eat too much, but it was still too much, if you catch me.

Hillbilly Handfishing. I think it’s ridiculous. Wading around in muddy, snake-infested water to let a huge catfish grab ahold of my arm and hand? Is this my idea of a good time? Nah. Now, let me say that if I were stranded in the woods and my survival was at stake, I would be happy to let a fish halfway eat my arm, because I would completely eat it later.  All I can say is I grew up in the south, and it would take a lot of desperation to even get me into any water ever again that is basically a haven for all things dangerous and disgusting. You’ve got your water moccasins, depending on location, you’ve got rattlers in the woods on the way down to the water, and possibly coral snakes hiding in the rock crevices you might climb about or around. You quite possibly could have alligators in the water, and most assuredly snapping turtles who really like toes. Then there’s leeches. Enough. I have not focused on low-carb enough in this post.

My weight is hanging at 135 again today, and I am pleased. I will continue to move forward.

As to the meatloaf question, I am thinking of trying the low-carb baking mix as a thickener. I don’t think almond flour is the ticket with the meatloaf. The eggs were not enough without something to thicken the loaf. I need to find a good thickener that is carb-free, or nearly so. I wonder about arrowroot. Isn’t it tasteless? I might try that soon and report to everyone how that turned out.

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2 thoughts on “Finding Bigfoot, Fried Cheese, and Hillbilly Handfishing

  1. I see the commercials for the Bigfoot show. Ok, it might be possible to find one in the mountains of the Pacific Northwest. When they find Bigfeet in Rhode Island and Ohio…nah. This is as bad as the ghost hunting shows.

    The danger in “Noodling” isn’t very large, since catfish don’t have teeth. Snakes don’t bite unless you mess with them.

  2. I’ve seen the bloody arms of the people going after those catfish. Again, fine for survival. If I want catfish, I know a good restaurant in town. Our other cat looks a bit like yours in the picture.

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